Reviews
Everything any of us has written up, lined up by film — same film, same row.
Beff 
Felicia 
Jesse 
Casey This was a fever dream. Insane 80's stuff. The production design was incredible. The story was all over the place, but it was kind of okay because of how consistently weird everything was. You could also really feel the movie struggling to stop itself from transforming into werewolf smut at every turn.
I hate the parts with Fred Savage and love the parts with Mandy Patinkin and Andre the Giant. I've never been a big fan of this movie because I was a Neverending Story kid. For some reason I always pit them against one another like there is a big 80's kid movie war going on in my head. It grows on me a little more with every rewatch, though.
This is an incredible documentary that plows right through the entirety of its rough-around-the-edges indie jank to deliver a very inspiring message about art and being an artist. Highly recommend going in blind.
This is an above average teen slasher that tips its hat to some other popular franchises like Saw and Escape Room, using an extreme haunted house as its setting. Grisly practical effects, a gaggle of memorable villains, and characters displaying the most plot-induced stupidity I've seen in recent memory. Worth a watch!
I've seen so many found footage films at this point that the format doesn't really work on me anymore. This is probably the most important one, but the Micah character is a very annoying and their liberal use of him while the tension is building makes this a slog at times.
This movie scared the bejesus out of me when I saw it years ago. Now that I’m older and have seen the horrors of the world first hand, I am unphased.
I really hope it’s not lost on Gillian Anderson (and I don’t think it is) that starring in a film about someone’s queer awakening is such a full circle moment for the entire generation of less than straight and questioning kids she helped usher in to that knowledge. Hannah Einbinder is all of us.
Loved how it looked, loved the Alex G music, and loved the needle drop. If you're looking for horror, you will be disappointed. It's very a disjointed, dreamlike surrealist dark comedy, and I was lost in the haze. Luckily I was watching it with a queer friend who could explain the message that Jane Schoenbrun was trying to convey during the credits. I had the same problem with I Saw The T.V. Glow and I loved that one a lot more after a Reddit deep dive and a rewatch. I probably need a second viewing now that I understand the subtext.
Beautifully filmed and really fun. Love the idea of using Bob Ross paintings as a backdrop for a movie like this.
Great animation, great music, very weird, and I couldn't really follow the story but it about dreaming so that's to be expected. Also, a degree of fat shaming that I haven't seen since kid movies from the 80's.
Beautiful animation, amazing soundtrack. Felt like you were meant to watch this as if you were inside a dream with the characters, which required you to loosen your ideas of plot and structure and just go along for the ride. The only downside to me was the depiction of certain characters that made it feel very dated to its time.
Definitely a Sam Raimi movie. I had to turn my head away until a scene was over because it was grossing me out, which doesn't happen to me that often. When it does happen, it's usually Sam Raimi's fault. The movie isn't particularly scary. It relies on jump scares a little too much, like most horror movies in 2009. It's just kind of loud and gross but there were enough laughs to keep it entertaining.
Realizing I’ve never seen a Sam Remi movie and didn’t know what I was getting into. That old bag was elbow deep in that girl’s mouth. So much mouth stuff BLECH
If you love watching jumpy dweebs with 90's haircuts get scared by something almost happening then this is the indie ghost hunting documentary for you. It's got every kind of nothing. Disturbed dust, shadows created by the film crew's own lights, knocking, creaking, flying brick, old lady who keeps batteries in a glory hole, glowing animal eyes... You name it. This documentary has nothing for everyone.
ED HARDY HAIR GEL REAL GHOST MEN SCREAMING RUN AWAY PANT CHAINS. Man these guys are insufferable but I’m addicted to their nonsense. Man Camp at its finest.
I've seen this about a dozen times, starting in the early 90's, and every time I watch it I think that at some point I'm going to hear Love Is A Battlefield by Pat Benatar, but the actual song in the movie is Invincible by Pat Benatar. It's my own little Mandela effect. It's so strong that I'm kind of convinced that I'm not alone; I'm just the only one reporting it.
This is a fun movie, very indie — a pretty unique story. The sound is AWFUL. I watch most stuff with headphones on, so I noticed every imperfection, and it felt like there was at least one in every single scene. In some scenes, it was so bad that it was distracting.
Went into this thinking it was gonna have teen horror vibes but hoo boy, this one earned its R rating. The violence was quick and jarring. A loud theatrical experience. Also 10/10 skittering. Upsetting in every way. But that’s a good thing.
Incredible everything. I was so distracted by a small music store needing 5 employees that I missed Andy Richter until the credits. That’s on me though. Inde Navarrette would get an Oscar for her performance in a just world.
This remains the best Tom Clancy adaptation and completely holds up except the USA and Russia both seem measured and competent. But aside from that...
I haven't watched any Scooby related stuff since I was a kid. Well, aside from the stuff from Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. This was a cheeky little tribute watch for Tim Curry who played Ben Ravencroft — an evil warlock guy. This was also apparently the introduction of the Hex Girls band that captured the imaginations of many witchy pre-teen girls in the early oughts.
RIP Tim Curry. He was the best part of this movie. He plays a version of the devil that is so over the top it's only rivaled by Dave Grohl in The Pick of Destiny. Also, Tom Cruise's middle tooth is in peak form. The sound is godawful. So bad I looked it up. Most of the movie was shot on a huge soundstage that was full of smoke machines and industrial fans to blow around the asbestos-or-whatever that was floating around in nearly every scene. Tons of ADR. A lot of production audio was unusable or replaced, and boy can you tell.
I absolutely love this movie from the very bottom of the my soul to the top of my heart. Every single person involved with the set design, the cinematography, the scenic art, the costume design, the make up, the props, the acting, the prosthetics were on their A GAME. The artistry involved to make a movie look and feel like this is sort of unfathomable to me. We don’t make movies like this anymore. I’ll never not marvel at Tim Curry projecting his bottomless charisma through probably like 70lbs of prosthetics. The performances of the side characters were also incredible, who ever was inside that Meg Mucklebones contraption (full body prosthetics, piles of goo, and strapped to some sort of hydrologic bouncy thing??? What??) deserves an Oscar. The only thing that brings this movie down is the sound design. It’s truly awful. Tinny and weird, mismatched. Who ever was working in the sound dept almost ruined this movie. Also that song by Tangerine Dream is AWFUL. There are parts of this movie that don’t make any sense at all but I still love it. I could watch it over and over and talk about it all day.
The week of Tim Curry continues. There are a bunch of fun songs in here. I liked Tim's the best. The kid was very annoying to me but I'm not sure why. He's not the only 90's movie kid who irrationally gets on my nerves, though.
There is not a single person who is normal in this film. This is the purest and most insane form of lightning in a bottle that I can ever recall seeing. Everything is so real, and so weird, and so fucked up. Everyone had to be exactly how they were for their entire lives — and all be in the same town — so that this unfettered chaos could come together into something just cohesive enough that you can't believe what you're watching is real life. It's a perfect documentary.
This movie is about passion and what happens to the human mind when you live in a place where it snows for half the year. Everyone is so authentically themselves I almost don’t believe they’re real.
A truly fulfilling sequel. Josef (sorry, Aaron) is back, baby, and he’s got a new arsenal of terrifyingly sincere personality quirks. Desiree Akhavan is in every way Duplass’s equal here, matching his freak with perfect execution. I can still hear Duplass yelling “mommy needs her juice” in quiet moments. Also I watched this movie for the first time, sat beside my mother and grandmother in a hotel bed after being evacuated from our homes due to wildfire, and anyway was not expecting Mark Duplass’s whole penis to make an appearance in that situation
This is such a good sequel that builds off of the original concept without it ever becoming stale. Masterful writing keeps the tension strong throughout. I loved Creep, but I may enjoy watching this more because Sara is a much more dynamic and fun character than Aaron was in the original. Desiree Akhavan killed it.
Typical 80's rom-com stuff. Rob Lowe's character didn't make sense coming out of Rob Lowe. Jim Belushi played a generational piece of shit to perfection. Elizabeth Perkins was the best part of the movie.
I watched this movie because I saw an interview where Sam Neill was asked which of his movies he wished more people had seen. He answered that this was one he was always very fond of. After watching it, I completely understand why. You will never guess, not in a million years, even from the synopsis, what this movie is about. Once you do, you will be hit with a rush of simultaneous delight and bafflement. I suggest you go in blind and hang on.
My friend Felicia said that Sam Neill wanted more people to watch this movie that he was in, so we did, and it was very good. Incredibly weird, funny, and SUPER British. One of the most British movies that I've ever seen.
LOOK I LIKED IT, OKAY!? I think if you want to experience the most immersive resident evil world without playing the games, these animated movies do it justice. This felt like playing RE3 but with the whole gang. Leon one-liners, a sewer level, and a huge wet monster. I don’t know what more you could ask for. Is it hilarious that it’s set in real actual Alcatraz? Yes. Does Chris’s VA sound like he’s seeing his lines for the very first time as he’s reading them off the sheet? Absolutely. Does the villain have the thinnest possible reason for trying to doom the world? Sure. But did any of that make me enjoy the avengers-style slow motion dodging of beastly appendages any less? Absolutely not. Sometimes you get to watch stuff just because it’s a cheesy fun time and that’s just fine. Neat, even.
It was better than I thought it would be. The video game style animation made it feel like a very long cutscene and when I'm playing games, I instinctually skip every cutscene that I encounter. The gunshots were distractingly loud, so if you're into protecting your hearing, be sure to lower the volume during the action scenes.
It's a fun summer camp movie. Not forging any new paths with the story but the characters and performances were all great. If you were a drama kid and really into musicals, it will probably hit half a star harder.
Deeply bizarre. Has obvious heart and characters I genuinely enjoyed, but gets SO egregiously weird in the third act that it left a meh taste in my mouth. Will Forte is unhinged in a way that made me feel like he was acting in a different movie. The marriage between charmingly strange and off-puttingly out-there didn’t totally mesh for me, but lots of fun moments and decent laughs. Would not have worked if it wasn’t Irish
An Irish absurdist horror-comedy where the story is kind of an afterthought, but all of the actors are so funny that it doesn't really matter. You're just kind of along for the weird ride. Unnecessarily gross at times.
It’s a cute movie with decent music. I’ve had one of the songs stuck in my head for days and it’s pissing me off
This movie never gets old. This is probably the tenth time I've seen it and it's just as good as it was the first time. One of the great 80's movies even though it was made in 2016.
Four wholly unprepared adventurers who don’t actually know how to swim take a boat out 12 miles from shore, which sinks INSTANTANEOUSLY. Once in the water, the four people experiencing a life and death situation talk and laugh and joke and just kinda hang out in one spot, barely moving. One earth hour passes before a shark is even sighted. And when it is, their solution is to kinda just sit there and look around. And then look under the water. And then look above the water. And then look under the water, and then…sorry, I nodded off. Also this movie is based on a true story. A true story which did not actually take place on or involve a reef in any way. Or a great white shark. Two stars for the cool shark footage. And hey…why did she give him a sausage?
They broke the cardinal rule of Chekhov's sausage and I just can't forgive that kind of thing.
I saw this once when I was very young and it very much never clicked with me that this whole thing was a very funny bit.
Robin Williams had insane range. I knew that already, but I love to be reminded. Every actor in this movie was nearly as great. They don't really make comedies like this anymore.
Timeless. Self aware, funny, cheesy, and delightfully mean. Skeet and Lillard are an iconic duo
Pretty funny. Recognized multiple memes that I did not know came from this movie. I wish that Nick Offerman and Kathryn Hahn had all of Jennifer Aniston's screen time. She just didn't fit the character she was playing.
I’ll preface by saying that Wes Anderson is very hit or miss for me, and the misses are BIG WHIFFS. This was a miss. What a truly nothing movie. I meant it when I said I’m fully done with movies that are just about shitty little guys. It has that very 90’s trope of weirdly intimate relationships between students and teachers that starts and stays gross. I get that you’re not supposed to like Jason Schwartzman’s character, but I found him so hateable that I actively didn’t want to look at the screen. The dialogue is frustratingly trite, there’s zero substance here. You’re perfectly within your rights to tell me I just don’t get it, but I’m completely fine with that.
Mads is always a treasure. And what a range. Dark, funny, and full of heart. Elicited several full bodied yells from me, and lots of laughs. What a weird but nice time
Lot of visual poop jokes, lot of RV slowly rolling away, lot of cringey slang, lot of Cheryl Hines.
I spend a of time imitating Werner Herzog whenever I watch his documentaries. Can't help it. Lots of very cool cave paintings, though. I was impressed with how good they were for being so old.
I think this is such a beautiful documentary. It moves quietly, it gives the viewer time to sit with the enormous expanse of time between when these drawings were created and when this doc was filmed. Herzog allows space for reverence in exactly the same way that motivated people to create those drawings in the first place. It documents careful documentation, and allows us to hear from experts while doing so. Creativity is a driving force in human nature, it always has been and always will be.
I have vague memories of seeing parts of this when I was a kid but this is the first time I’ve watched it all the way through. Lot of weird sounds coming out of that little guy. Holds up pretty well!
Whoever pitched Jesse Eisenberg as leading man in a comedy was wild for that. I mean I guess he was born to play an awkward, anxious teen finding himself in insane situations, but he is neither interesting nor charismatic enough to pull this off. Truly didn’t care if a single one of these people survived. But in fairness, I think I just missed the boat when this was every highschool shithead’s favorite movie in 2009.
I truly thought that the meme of Woody Harrelson rubbing money in his crying eyes was from 1995's Money Train. As soon as I saw him lying down in this movie, I knew I was about to get Mandela'd. Also, the replica screen printed Warhol in that mansion was sick.
Decent summer movie about teenaged shenanigans with a great soundtrack. Needed a lot more Bill Hader & Kristen Wiig.
It's cute and not a bad hang, but I have seen this same concept reskinned a few too many times at this point in my life.